Monday, 5 November 2007

I Hate My Body


I've been participating in VI's diet trial for a week now, and had been doing superbly despite a few hiccups. When I weighed myself Saturday morning (which I really wasn't supposed to do), I had lost SIX pounds. I've never lost that much weight in one week ever.

I credit the diet blog, which makes me think about what I eat and why (lots of bread), and walking the dog. However, I had a busy weekend, with lots of eating and drinking. And I let hubby walk the dog on Saturday and Sunday. And in my HRT cycle, I'm on the week that if I were still pre-menopausal would be pre-menstrual. (Does that make sense?)

Anyway, I also woke up this morning feeling like I'd been hit by a cement truck. I could be getting son's cold. I have a scratchy throat and just feel really down.

And I'm wondering if I should follow up my encounter with the head at my daughter's school with a letter to the board of governors. Not to complain about the head, but to make suggestions as to how they could better implement their Health and Safety policy when it comes to school discos. After all, they are about to become a grant-maintained school, which means among other things that they will be paying for their own insurance. Surely, they will want to ensure that there is absolutely no room for culpability in the case of fire.

But then again perhaps I should just let things lie. Bskove's comment on my previous post, while a bit annoying and maybe even unnecessarily harsh, did make me think twice about my further communications with the school. There are always those with a different point of view, and it can be useful to consider them.

I also have a million things to do, and hardly any time, it feels, to do them. Considering I don't have a job, I sure am busy. Way too busy to clean the house, for example. Or to take my car in to have the tires checked (I know, I know). I'll have to find the time for the tires. I just hate hanging around places like that. And I haven't had time to catch up with my blog pals either. I'll wait till the kids are in bed and the ironing is done, I guess.

And have I mentioned I hate my body?

11 comments:

J said...

COngrats on that initial loss. I need a jump start. If I could only give up the zinfandel. Even when I am being really good, I still can't seem to get rid of some of the softness. 300 sit-ups a week and I still have a muffin-top. Argh.

Maybe wait a couple more weeks before communicating with the board of governors so that you are sure you are communicating helpful suggestions, not acting in backlash. I do think you were right in your anger at that woman, but channeling that energy so it is truly constructive would be the goal now, I think.

Chopski said...

How many calories in a hiccup?

laurie said...

you should like you've had a frustrating couple of weeks here.

dieting makes me cranky.

but six pounds is terrific! even if you got a little lax, there's always today (or tomorrow) to be vigilant again.

i have been working pretty hard at losing the weight i gained over the summer (which is odd--usually i lose easily in teh summer, when im more active, and gain in the winter).

i have one pound to go. then i hope to lose five more. good for you.

and don't be so hard on yourself. i've never seen it, but i think you hvae a very wonderful body--because it has your head on it. and you have a great brain!

Flowerpot said...

brilliant weight loss - I trust you're feeling good about that, despite the oncoming cold. As Laurie says, the brain is excellent so fret not about the body!

BSkove, Publisher said...

Six pounds in one week is awesome! You shouldn't be so hard on yourself. You've had a crappy week, you're mad about your daughter's school, and now you're getting a cold.

Have some hot tea with a little honey and whiskey in it, read a short story, and take a short nap. You'll feel better.

And even though you don't agree with my assessment of the disco event, I agree with you that you might want to do something about it- because you'll feel better once it's out. But I would also agree with J and wait a bit so your words are perfectly formed when you put them to paper. I've read your blog for a while and you're not a vindictive person-just temporarily fed up by a stuffy headmistress (I guess that's the same as a principal in the US?)

Continued good luck with the weight loss. After 40 (years old) it gets harder and harder. I've only lost 4 POUNDS IN 5 WEEKS!!! UGh. But, like J, I can't give up the zin. 2 pre-teen boys you know...

wakeupandsmellthecoffee said...

j.: good advice to wait. Softness is nice. You don't want to look like Madonna.

chopski: Hey, welcome. It all depends on how many beers you've had.

laurie: You've almost made me cry. Thank you for such a supportive comment.

flowerpot: I've been trying to lose this weight for about six months (though not very hard). Wish I could just forget about it, but I don't feel well at this weight. All bloated and blah!

bskove: Yes, head mistress is the same as principal. I'm not the only one to have had frustrating encounters with her. Many parents don't rate her very highly. Yes, some hot tea with lemon (I don't like whiskey) sounds very good. After the ironing.
Get a dog, if you don't already have one. My walks with Jake are definitely a good thing.

Kaycie said...

Congratulations on the weight loss! That's wonderful.

If you still want to follow up with the board in a few days, I say you should go ahead and do it. It's only information.

Remember that we all like you exactly the way you are.

Crystal Jigsaw said...

Of course we all know it's what's on the inside that's important. And you have a heart filled with gold nuggets.

Well done for losing weight, I expect it's encouraging. I should start probably after Christmas.

Crystal xx

Vi vi vi vooom!!!!!!!! said...

Keep going mate, and you wont hate your body so much. (oh and your cycle' could have affected the scales the next day, you know what I'm talking about) x

wakeupandsmellthecoffee said...

kaycie: thanks for the encouraging words.

CJ: Aren't you a sweetie. And I've seen your photo. You don't need to worry about anything after Christmas.

VI: I'll get there eventually. I started to count the calories now.

menopausaloldbag (MOB) said...

Six pounds - one pound off a dress size. Sooooperb! I hate my body too but guess what? My husband loves it so at least one of us does!