Thursday, 12 July 2007

Notes from an Unstable Mind

I've always thought there was something familiar about novelist Julian Barnes. Today, glancing at the Daily Torygraph at the hairdresser's, I realised what it was. Yes, it's the Tin Man! That's what happened to him when he left Oz. He headed for the UK to write novels, one of which I could not finish reading. Now where are the Scarecrow and Lion?
I started to write a post about the Death of Feminism. But really that's far too deep for me today. I just don't have the energy. So I'll just be silly.
Silly observation No. 2: I think the song "Chasing Cars" by my favourite band Snow Patrol is about dogs. Think about it.
Silly observation No. 3: On Saturday I had the pleasure of attending my friend's son's Year Six play at his snooty private school. She got tickets for all of the group but I was the only sucker who went. Here's what I observed: all the mothers have blonde hair. So do I (chemically enhanced these days), but these women were Blonde. If they were American, they'd be Republicans, cheering on their sons who no doubt will grow up to be leaders of some sort. These mothers don't work (neither do I but that's neither here nor there) but do drive some enormous SUVs (the better to fit the young Republicans and their dogs in) (and I don't drive one of those).
Silly observation No. 4: Still on the play. Here's one difference between private school plays and state school plays -- the costumes and scenery. Private schools can afford to hire or buy some really ornate costumes and scenery. State schools make do with what the teachers can find in the market. Also, the script. This play was about pirates who land on a desert island that is actually occupied by a rather fey (even homosexual) character who dreams of cheese rather than the lovely beauties he is stranded with. When a squire arrives, he is taken off for "a good seeing-to" by said beauties. Then noises of a certain kind are heard from offstage and he reappears with wig askew and lipstick on his face (where do they get lipstick on a desert island?). Is it just me or does this sound like a bit, well, sophisticated for 11-year-old boys?
Silly observation No. 5: Actually, this isn't so silly. Apparently, Dubya messed up big time in commuting Scooter Libby's sentence. According to the NY Times, he has now created a legal precedent that goes against everything his administration has been working for. Lawyers across the country are rubbing their hands in glee at the thought of using the Libby precedent to get their clients out of serving sentences that are supposedly incommensurate with the crime. How much more of an idiot can Dubya be? Of course, he had to buy Libby's silence; otherwise, he and Cheney could be impeached probably, at the least.
Silly observation No. 6: It never rains when I take my umbrella, but it pours when I leave it at home.
Silly observation No. 7: Charlie Sheen has just announced his engagement. His fiancee must have missed the bit about him visiting prostitutes and cheating on his last wife.
Silly observation No. 8: I've been watching "Brothers and Sisters" but have to say I find it to be lightweight and Hollywoodized. Last night a sister tried to give her daughter an insulin injection but daughter wasn't having it so Drug Addict Brother comes over and does the job expertly. Hmm, maybe Pete Doherty should do a guest appearance. Which leads nicely to ...
Silly observation No. 9: What the hell did Kate Moss see in Pete Doherty? And on to...
Silly observation No. 10: I know Paul McCartney is a god and everything but, really, didn't he think for one second, "I wonder if this young bird is after my money?"
And that's all folks. For now.


Anonymous said...

Excellent: very silly post...

Love your comment about mothers who don't work! My nephews go to a private school and most of the mothers there don't work either. They are all blonde, always made up to the nines, poking about in handbags for lipstick and vanity mirrors just in case Mr. Bigwigs comes out of the school hall and all drive brand new 4x4's. Not that I've got anything against 4x4's of course, having Norman is the epitome of class in my book!

Crystal xx

Queen Vixen said...

I enjoyed your silly observations. My son went to private school (he had hearing problems when younger and we thought it was the best thing for him) the school was a good experience for him, but I felt our faces did not fit. I worked for a start off, had a rover 25 and although blonde was not the sort to whoop and holler over a crappy school performance. (Is it me, or are they mostly awful). My son is now in sixth form at the local state school - the standards of music and drama are soooo much higher. The opportunities are greater, his social life has exploded I am beginning to think we wasted our money for all those years. He was glad to get out.

lady macleod said...


But I don't know Babe you sound distressingly close to the "Blonde Mothers", and I know them so very well from Q's school days. um hmmm.

I can't comment on the play as I am still saying, Quoi?

J said...

Excellent post. Very fun.

Observation 3: You have expertly described the PTA clique in my town.

Observation 4: 11 year olds? That does sound a bit off for that age group.

Observation 5: Sigh. Even in my very conservative town, there has started to be a Dubya backlash. Whereas we used to get flying birds for the more left-leaning stickers on our cars, we are now getting some thumbs up. We haven't changed the stickers in five years. Come to think of it, I haven't seen any "Thank You Florida" stickers in a long, long time.

Observation 7: All Charlie Sheen's fiance needs to do is actually read his IMDB biography to get a clear picture of the guy. Ick.

Observation 10: It still amazes me what men will do and the justifications they will make when thinking with their johnsons. It's become sad.

Pixie said...

I went to private school, oh what a confession. I got the crapiest education that anyone could ever have had.
And it only took me till I was 44 to work out I wasn't stupid

Does make you wonder when George W will answer for all the shit he's caused one way or another.

laurie said...


there's a sitcom on american tv called "the new adventures of old christine" and those blond moms with the vanity mirrors are in that show. you portrayed them perfectly.

and i love those "separated at birth" pairings. i'd never thought of the tin man and julian barnes before, but you're absolutely right.

(ps which of his books couldn't you finish? i loved "metroland" and loved loved LOVED "a history of the world in 10 1/2 chapters." but i've read nothing of his since.)

wakeupandsmellthecoffee said...

CJ: I don't work either and I'm blonde, but my point is that there's a special type that I thankfully don't conform to. Have you ever posted a picture of Norman? I'm dying to see him.

QV: Have your son's hearing problems cleared up? You did what you thought was best at the time. And now you're doing something else you think is best.

Lady M: I may look like them but I definitely do not act like them. I've always said I'm a redhead deep inside (and have I told you how envious I am of your auburn locks?).

J. I'm from Florida. How awful was that during the hanging chad business?

Pixie: I too went to private school and so did not want that for my kids. I turned out OK and would say I had a pretty good education, but it's the mindset I can't stand.

Laurie; It was "England, England." I saw The New Adventures of the Old Christine on the plane when I was flying back from Florida last month. Too funny!

ABBAGirl said...

ha! love your silly observations. but silly they're not!

yes, bush is an idiot. but the one thing you can say about him is that he's loyal to his friends to the end; for him, loyalty transcends all else. and heck yeah, that's scary!

pete doherty is soo nasty! he's disgusting! i'm glad kate moss finally got rid of his scab-infested, dirty a$$!

i'm so excited david beckham's in the states -- despite his annoyingly squeaky voice and all. ;)

love your posts -- you write so well!!

DJ Kirkby said...

oooh more silly comment days please, I enjoyed this post!

Kelly said...

You are cutting too close to the bone WUASTC! Very funny, esp. links between Brothers and Sisters (which has yet to earn it's place on my Sky+ recorder) and Pete Doherty. And don't even get me started on Heather 'social-climber' Mills-McCartney....

wakeupandsmellthecoffee said...

abbagirl: Thanks very much. I enjoy your posts too, especially the music. Can't figure out how to do that on mine. I'm doing well just getting the pix on. DB is very nice to look at, but not to hear.

DJ: I'll try to be silly more often. So much more fun than being serious, don't you think?

Kelly: I saw HMM on the American dance programme the other day. Apart from having a fake leg, she has no grace whatsoever. Paul should have taken her dancing first. Then he would have known what he was dealing with.