I try so hard to remain positive and to try to think of things from Future Ex-Hubby's perspective.
And then I come home and the kitchen door is shut. That is a sure indicator that he's on the phone railing against me. And so he was with Julie16, his new internet girlfriend (has she seen him, several of my friends have asked). According to the fictional life this liar lives, the kids are very loyal to him. Daughter called him at work asking him to come home the other day because there was trouble at home, according to him. I asked her about this. She said she called him because she wanted a lift to her friend's house and I couldn't take her. Daughter hit son's nose with her ankle accidentally on Sunday. I just found out about it today. According to Future Ex-Hubby, they didn't say anything till today because they were afraid I'd shout at them. I asked Daughter. She said she wanted to tell me but son didn't. I didn't shout, for the record. The one who would have shouted, the one whose reaction Daughter was so keen to see, is Future Ex-Hubby.
We got our Decree Nisi yesterday. In 6 weeks I could apply for the Decree Absolute and be divorced. But I won't till the financial settlement is completed. And since Future Ex-Hubby is lying about that as well, that may take some time.
As I said, I do try. But he makes it bloody difficult with his lies. Should I tell the kids what he says? I'm afraid they'd just stick up for him and be even more down on me.
Whenever anyone shows me a modicum of kindness, I just about grovel at their feet in gratitude. That's because it's so bad here. Daughter's friend gave her a Pandora bracelet and three charms today. Just because. I'd planned to give that to her for her birthday. Don't need to bother now.
Maybe Future Ex-Hubby is feeling insecure because he sees that the kids and I get along better. And of course he doesn't want that. Maybe I should spit in his food every night (I still cook his meals). Or rub his shirts in cat litter. That's not really me but he makes me so angry with his lies.
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4 comments:
Hmmm, I know that it's hard on you but I'm loving that he's so desparate that he's built a house of lies. Get your half of the money, get an apartment and create a soft place for your kids to be. I think when it's all over and the dust settles, the kids' inner compass will guide them to you. Just keep mothering them no matter how they act - 'cause they need you. Take care!
Agree. Say nothing. His true character will out in their eyes eventually. You have nothing to gain by slagging him off at the moment, and when they realise what you've been putting up with (as they surely will) you'll look like a saint!
Yes, definately take the moral high ground and just be a great Mum to the kids. They are kids, they have no idea how much their actions can hurt or upset you, they are just getting on with their lives and being kids. Us adults take things far too seriously!
Take care of yourself, please go out and give yourself a treat, even if it's just a nice walk in a place you like, you deserve a break.x
I really feel for you and the situation you find yourself in at present. Remember it will not always be like this♥ I have to admit you are a bigger person than I would be in this situation, hell would freeze over before I cooked him another meal:( I have been in a very similar position many years ago and had 2 children 8 and 5, it was a very sad and hard time. Sending your big (((hugs))) wakeup. Thank goodness you have your blog to vent:) xxxxx
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